Triple Threat

I have 3 phishing and spam emails to share. Since they're all very short, I'm combining them into one post.

And, by the way, has anyone else considered sending these people spam right back? I mean, they are sending out these emails to just anyone! Make them work to find the suckers in the bunch! Or, as I'm doing, post the email addys in hopes that the bots will pick them up for the spam lists. Or, collect all the emails, then contact each one with a hot "lead"....

From: kingstonlenders001@comcast.net
To: undisclosed-recipients: ;
Subject: Affordable Loan Offer @ 3% $$$$$$$$$$$ Apply Today
Date: Wed
05/07/08 06:15 PM


Mr Kings Bridge of KINGSTON FINANCIAL LOAN INC.
has opened opportunity to all in need of financial aid, Get loan at 3% interest
rate today while offer lasts. All response should be forwarded to
kingstonloaninc@live.com.

Yes please! Sign me up for a loan from someone who doesn't write in English well. And, oh yes, the live.com email address just screams professional.

From: UKNL@swip002.ftl.affinity.com,
2008@swip002.ftl.affinity.com,EDITION@swip002.ftl.affinity.com
Reply-To:
mr.grahamwilbert_uknl@hotmail.com
To: unlisted-recipients:; (no To-header on
input)
Subject: Notification Letter
Date: Wed 05/07/08 08:32 PM

UK NATIONAL LOTTERY DESK
Reference No: ACCU/2007-200
Operation
Code No: A333/ZZ5

We use this medium to notify you of the lottery prize
won by our email
address. Contact the claims officer below via email:

Mr. Graham Wilbert,
Tel: +44 704 575 9999
Email:
mr.grahamwilbert_uknl@hotmail.com

Regards,
Notification Department.

Wow. Thank you so much for sending me notification of your email address winning the lottery. So, I should care why?

From: "Mou Xinsheng"
Reply-To: mou_xinsss@hotmail.com
To: undisclosed-recipients:;
Subject: GREETINGS FROM CHINA
Date: Mon
05/12/08 06:51 AM


Hello,
I want to solicit your attention to
recieve money on my behalf.The
purpose
of my contacting you is because I
need your assistance. When you reply
this message,I will send you the full
details and more information about
myself and the funds. My personal email
is :
mou_xxinsheng01@yahoo.com.cn
Thank you. Mou Xinsheng

Ok, even if I thought this was legit, why would I want to do this "favor" for a complete stranger? Hmmm? *sigh* You know, I don't ever skewer these people because they're all the same, and there's only so many ways to say SCAM!

Phish: Federal Bureau of Investigation

Oh, dear dog. This scam made me LOL. Srsly.

Look. This is a scam. A poorly written scam. A completely unbelievable scam. But, because I'm in a good mood tonight, and this particular email is so durn funny, I'm going to bold the mis-spellings and the weird capitalization. Personal comment will be in red. Not all of it, of course. That would take too long. Just the really obvious stuff.

---

From: "Robert S. Mueller III"
Reply-To: fbi.federalbureau-investigation@live.com
To: "."@pop.co.th
Subject: Federal Bureau of Investigation
Date: Wed 05/07/08 05:43 PM


Federal Bureau of Investigation
J. Edgar Hoover Building
935 Pennsylvania Avenue,
NW Washington, D.C. 20535-0001, USA.

RE: FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION SEEKING TO WIRETAP THE INTERNET

We the Federal bureau of investigation (FBI) Washington, DC in
conjunction
with some other relevant Investigation Agencies here in the United
states of America have recently been informed through our Global
intelligence monitoring network that you presently have a transaction
going on with of Bank of Africa (CBN) as regards to your over-due
contract payment which was
fully endorsed in your favor accordingly.

Ok, just look at that shoddy capitalization. And there are people who are actually going to believe that this is a legit email!

It might interest you to know that we have taken out time in screening
through this project as stipulated on our protocol of operation and
have finally confirmed that your contract payment is 100% genuine and
hitch free from all fact and of which you have the lawful right to claim
your fund without any further delay.

"and hitch free from all fact". Well. Yes. They are telling the truth there. At first I laughed at the pathetic error, until I realized that they may be using that as an out if they get caught. "But we told them it was free from fact!"

Having said all this, we will further advise that you go ahead in
dealing
with the United Bank of Africa office accordingly, as we will be
monitoring all their services with you as well as your correspondence
at
all level.

In addendum, also be informed that we recently had a meeting with the
Executive Director of the Uinted Bank of Africa, in the person of Mr
Tony Elumelu along with some of the top officials of the Ministry
regarding your case and they made us to understand that your file has
been held in abase
depending on when you personally come for the claim.

Honestly? I didn't follow that. It sounded like they're holding funds until I show up. I assume that's what it means.

They also told us that the only problem they are facing right now is
that
some unscrupulous element are using this project as an avenue to
scam innocent people off their hard earned money by impersonating the
Executive Governor and the Central Bank office.

Really? An unscrupulous element are using this as a scam? Really? *gasp* I can't believe that anyone would do such a thing! Bwhahahah! This is like the "free of fact" from above.

We were also made to understand that a lady with name Mrs. Joan C.
Bailey
from OHIO has already contacted them and also presented to them all
the necessary documentation?s evidencing your claim purported to have
been signed personally by you prior to the release of your contract fund
valued at about US$10,000,000.00 (Ten Million United States Dollars.),
but the United Bank office did the wise thing by insisting on hearing
from you personally before the go ahead on wiring your fund to the Bank
information?s which was forwarded to them by the above named Lady so
that was the main reason why they contacted us so as to assist them in
making the investigations.

Try to say that ten times fast. Now. Are they saying that this "Lady" (apparently we have nobility in OHIO) contacted them on my behalf, or that she's trying to *ahem* scam them into giving them *ahem* my money? I think the latter, but on first read, I thought the former.

They further informed us that we should warn our dear citizens who must
have been informed of the contract payment which was awarded to them
from the United Bank of Africa, to be very careful prior to this
irregularities so that they don't fall victim to this ugly circumstance.

To this ugly circumstance? Um, you mean "to this scam"? And by this scam, I mean both the one you talk about, and the one you are.

And should incase you are already dealing with anybody or office
claiming
to be from the United Bank of Africa, you are further advised to
STOP further contact with them in your best interest and then contact
immediately the real office of the United Bank of Africa (UBA) only with
the below information?s accordingly:

Oh my dog. This one just cracked me up as well. If you're already dealing with UBA, stop! And contact them from the address below- which is provided by someone claiming to be the FBI, yet doesn't write well in English. Um....

NAME: MR TONY ELUMELU (MFR)
OFFICE ADDRESS: United Bank of Africa,
COOPERATE BUILDING
U.B.A HOUSE, 57 MARINA,
P.O.BOX 2406 ,LAGOS NIGERIA
TEL: +234-1-4181333
+234-8088348052

I used to delete all contact information from the scam emails I posted, but I realized that some people doing a search may be searching by phone number, address, etc. I'm just trying to help those souls who need convincing that they're really not that lucky by making it easy for them to find the info they need.

Email: unitedbnkofafrica.remittancedept@live.com
NOTE: In your best interest, any message that doesn't come from the
above
official email address and phone numbers should not be replied to
and should be disregarded accordingly for security reasons.

Bwhahahahah! Right. The official email of a bank is hosted by live.com. Riiiight.

Meanwhile, we will advise that you contact the United Bank of Africa
office immediately with the above email address and request that they
attend to your payment file as directed so as to enable you receive
your
contract fund accordingly.

Sometimes I just want to respond to these things to see what they say next, but, sadly, I don't have time to sit on my butt amusing myself all day.

Ensure you follow all their procedure as may be required by them as that
will further help hasten up the whole procedures as regards to the
transfer of your fund to you as designated.

How about if I don't?

Also have in mind that the United Bank of Africa equally have their own
protocol of operation as stipulated on their banking terms, so delay
could be very dangerous.

Dangerous? Dangerous how? Are they going to send a hit man after me for not responding? Cuz, yanno, I'm thinking that the big boys (the ones who really do have hit men) actually can make a convincing scam.

Once again, we will advise that you contact them with the above email
address and make sure you forward to them all the necessary
information?s which they may require from you prior to the release of
your fund to you accordingly.

All the information. Hm.. like name, address, SSN? You know, information that should not be given to strangers who contact you out of the blue?

All modalities has already been worked out even before you were
contacted
and note that we will be monitoring all your dealings with them as
you proceed so you don't have anything to worry about.

Oh, I feel so safe. You're watching my every move. And you're the FBI. Because you said so. And what are modalities?

All we require from you henceforth is an update so as to enable us be on
track with you and the United Bank of Africa. Without wasting much
time,will want you to contact them immediately with the above email
address so as to enable them attend to your case accordingly without any
further delay as time is already running out.

Wordy barstuds, aren't you?

Should in case you need any more information?s in regards to this
notification,feel free to get back to us so that we can brief you more
as
we
are here to guide you during and after this project has been completely
perfected and you have received your contract fund as stated.

Ah. I'm so glad that the FBI is going to guide me while this project is perfected.

Thank you very much for your co-operation in advance as we earnestly
await your urgent response to this matter.

All of my responses are urgent. I don't know why, they just take everything so seriously.

Best Regards,
Robert S. Mueller III
Federal Bureau of Investigation
Email: fbi.federalbureau-investigation@live.com

Ah. I see why the bank's official email address is hosted by live.com. After all, if it's good enough for the FBI....

Phish: Project For Charity

Now here's a bright one. First, he says he has a charity project that would be financially beneficial. Well... that's what charity's for! Or did he mean financial benefit to me? Because, then it's not charity.

Then, he wants a response from a personal email, and not an "official" email? Um. Why? Even if it weren't obvious that this is a scam, it would still be weird.

Next!


From: "Mr Vladimir Russu"
Reply-To: vrussu@yahoo.com
To: undisclosed-recipients: ;
Subject: Project for Charity
Date: Tue 05/06/08 05:46 PM

Greetings,
I have a charity project I wish to propose to you that will be of
great
benefit financially.
Please contact me via my personal email:
vrussu@yahoo.com from your personal email and not an official email.
Mr Vladimir Russu

Phish: BARRISTER NELSON UDO

Good Lord, where to start with this one?

Ok. Again. Professional correspondence will not be coming from Yahoo. Unless it's Yahoo itself that's contacting you- and even then I'd be suspicious.

The "ATTENTION DEAR" does crack me up though. How sweet. He thinks I'm dear. Aw.

Again, we have poor spellings, grammar, and well, poor English. Huge tip off. And again, no one will contact you out of the blue about having a huge sum of money just awaiting your acceptance. And, they're not going to mistake you for someone else. If they did mistake you for someone else, and you did accept a large amount of money- you can bet they'd figure it out eventually and then you're in trouble. So don't take the chance.

Something I've not noticed before: They actually want your pic! Um, why? The only thing that I can think of is to make photo ids? I don't know. That doesn't make any sense. Maybe they're collecting pictures to put with fake "what a wonderful service!" type of comments? Making fake blogger accounts?

Whatever. Just DO NOT SEND ANY INFORMATION TO THESE PEOPLE. That's all.



From: "BARRISTER NELSON UDO" , <".yahoocom>"@NONE>
Reply-To: g_speed_couriercompany79@yahoo.fr
Subject: BARRISTER NELSON UDO
Date: Mon 05/05/08 06:47 AM


ATTENTION DEAR,

I have been waiting for you since to come down here and pick your money
but I did not heard from you since that time as we fixed.Then I went and
deposited the $1.5,000 000.00 Million USA Dollars,as consignment box to
GLOBAL SPEED COURIER COMPANY LIMITED in Benin Republic,because I
travelled to SAUDI ARABIA to visit my friend and i will not come back
till next month ending.

I want You to contact the GLOBAL SPEED COURIER COMPANY LIMITED to know
when they will deliver your consignment boxes. I have paid for the
delivering charges The only money you have to send to them is
the,security keeping fee, which is $135.00 Us Dollars to received your
consignment boxes.

CONTACT PERSON; DR.DAVID AKA DISTRICT MANAGER GS Courier Company
Limited BENIN

REPUBLIC.E-mail:( g_speed_couriercompany79@yahoo.fr ) CONTACT
PHONE+229-9369-7920


Try to contact them as soon as possible to avoid increasing the security
keeping fee. I gave them your delivering address but you have to
reconfirm it to them again to avoid any mistake on the
delivering.Reconfirm below information to the company.



Your Full Name-----------------------

Your Address---------------------------

Home telephone---------------------

Office telephone---------------------

Your pic----------------------------------

Let me know as soon as you receive your consignment boxes,and check the
contents weather the complete of the total $1.500.000.00

Regards

BARRISTER NELSON UDO

Phish: Microsoft Email Sweepstakes,(Winner) Amount Won:(500.000.00 GBP) Reply Urgently for claims.

Ok, I actually like this one. It's like a haiku for spam. And don't you just love how the entire body is copied as the subject line?

I have to wonder though- why do I keep "winning" money in Great British Pounds? Is it because they actually researched me and found that I'm obsessed with all things British? Is it because they think the entire world outside of wherever they're based is British? Or do they just pick a random monetary designations?

But, sorry. I will not "reply urgently". I do very little urgently, actually.


From: "beavffa@ptsi.net"
Reply-To: beavffa@ptsi.net
Subject: Microsoft Email Sweepstakes,(Winner) Amount Won:(500.000.00 GBP) Reply Urgently for claims.
Date: Tue 04/08/08 02:26 PM


Microsoft Email Sweepstakes,

(Winner) Amount Won:

(500.000.00 GBP)

Reply Urgently

For Claims.

Phish: Urgent mail from Zhang Morgan Liu

Ok. Classic example of poor English. There's your first tip off. Secondly- no legitimate business is going to contact a random stranger that was found in an email directory (particularly if your email address isn't in an email directory). Stating that they haven't met me before is, um, obvious. I think I'd know if I'd met them or not.

I absolutely love the vagueness of a "business proposal" and a "transaction", and how they'll "get back to me" on its "urgency". Riiiight. Sometimes I'm tempted to respond, just so I can here more absurdities, but really, who needs that when you have the news?

From: "Zhang Morgan Liu"
Reply-To: zhangm_liu60@terra.com
To: undisclosed-recipients: ;
Subject: Urgent mail from Zhang Morgan Liu
Date: Tue 04/08/08 05:44 PM

From :Zhang Morgan Liu
Email:zhangm_liu60@terra.com

Attn.,

I hope this mail finds you well. Zhang Morgan Liu is my name and I am
writing to direct an urgent business proposal to you . I really have not
personally met with you before. Your contact information was gotten from
an email directory.

I would be needing your attention on an urgent business transaction.
Owing to the urgency of this transaction,I would appreciate an immediate
response from you to confirm the receipt of my mail. As soon as I get
this response from you,I would furnish you with details of the
transaction and the urgency at which we need to get it concluded.



Kind regards,
Zhang Morgan

Phish: Donation Winner Notice

To be honest, I don't even know what this one means. Big tip offs: Some place in Italy telling you that you won 650K in Great British Pounds. Ain't gonna happen. Again, an unprofessional email, going to the wrong person? Trust me, you don't want to fall for this.

From: iveco@gtghhhhh.net
To: if@urg.org
Subject: Donation Winner Notice
Date: Sat 04/26/08 09:45 AM

Chiesa Cattolica Italiana hereby notify you as their Winner Online of
650,000.00GBP.

Please quote your Qualification numbers N-222-6647, E-910-56,(fullNames,
address, country, age, sex, occupation, telephone number

To: Executive Rev .Sis Tema Ancelloti
Email: rev.sistemaancelloti@rogers.com

Best Regards,

Rose Wood

Phish: ATM CARD UPDATE

Ok, first of all. No professional will ever send you a formal email that is written entirely in caps. Secondly, no professional will be sending you an email from yahoo.com, or expect you to reply to such an address. And, of course, "antbello4love" is such a professional address to have. Really.

Although, I would really like to know what "none officials in the bank" are. Really. I have a friend who works at a credit union, but she's never mentioned a title called "none" to me. Hm...

I'm going to totally ignore the spelling and grammar issues- and all the reasons why someone with several million dollars to give away is not going to slip up and send the email to the wrong person. Or an email at all. Or give out sensitive information. Or sound as if they're scolding you for being obstinate and trying to get the money the wrong way. Or.... you get the idea.

This is a scam!


From: DR.HASSAN OBEY
Reply-To: janebull_2008@yahoo.com

OFFICE OF THE CHIEF AUDITOR TO THE PRESIDENT,

INTERNATIONAL CREDIT SETTLEMENT

SIR/MADAM,

THIS IS TO OFFICIALLY INFORM YOU THAT WE HAVE VERIFIED YOUR CONTRACT
/INHERITANCE FILE AND FOUND OUT THAT WHY YOU HAVE NOT RECEIVED YOUR
PAYMENT IS BECAUSE YOU HAVE NOT FUFILLED THE OBLIGATIONS GIVEN TO YOU IN
RESPECT OF YOUR CONTRACT/INHERITANCE PAYMENT.

SECONDLY WE HAVE BEEN INFORMED THAT YOU ARE STILL DEALING WITH THE NONE
OFFICIALS IN THE BANK, ALL IN YOUR ATTEMPT TO SECURE THE RELEASE OF THE
FUND TO YOU. WE WISH TO ADVISE YOU THAT SUCH AN ILLEGAL ACT LIKE THIS
HAVE TO STOP IF YOU WISHES TO RECEIVE YOUR PAYMENT SINCE WE HAVE DECIDED
TO BRING A SOLUTION TO YOUR PROBLEM. RIGHT NOW WE HAVE ARRANGED YOUR
PAYMENT THROUGH OUR SWIFT CARD PAYMENT CENTER ASIA PACIFIC, THAT IS THE
LATEST INSTRUCTION FROM MR. PRESIDENT, ALHAJI UMARU MUSA YARADUA (GCFR)
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA.

THIS CARD CENTER WILL SEND YOU AN ATM CARD WHICH YOU WILL USE TO
WITHDRAW YOUR MONEY IN ANY ATM MACHINE IN ANY PART OF THE WORLD, BUT THE
MAXIMUM IS ONE THOUSAND, FIVE HUNDRED UNITED STATES DOLLARS PER DAY. SO
IF YOU LIKE TO RECEIVE YOUR FUND IN THIS WAY, PLEASE LET US KNOW BY
CONTACTING THE ATM PAYMENT DEPARTMENT DIRECTOR AND ALSO SEND THE
FOLLOWING INFORMATION AS LISTED BELOW.

1. FULL NAME

2. FULL ADDRESS (P.O BOX NOT ACCEPTABLE)

3. PHONE AND FAX #

4. YOUR AGE, SEX AND CURRENT OCCUPATION

5. ATTACH COPY OF YOUR IDENTIFICATION

HOWEVER, KINDLY FIND BELOW THE CONTACT PERSON:

REVEN JANE BULL

INTEGRATED PAYMENT DEPARTMENT

EMAIL:janebull_2008@yahoo.com

THE ATM CARD PAYMENT CENTER HAS BEEN MANDATED TO ISSUE OUT $2,300,000.00
AS PART PAYMENT FOR THIS QUATER. ALSO FOR YOUR INFORMATION, YOU HAVE TO
STOP ANY FURTHER COMMUNICATION WITH ANY OTHER PERSON(S) OR OFFICE(s) TO
AVOID ANY HITCHES IN RECEIVING YOUR PAYMENT.

NOTE THAT BECAUSE OF IMPOSTORS, WE HEREBY ISSUE YOU OUR CODE OF CONDUCT,
WHICH IS (ATM-811) SO YOU HAVE TO INDICATE THIS CODE WHEN CONTACTING THE
CARD CENTER BY USING IT AS YOUR SUBJECT.

REGARDS,

DR.HASSAN OBEY.

CHIEF AUDITOR TO THE PRESIDENT

FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA

About Fried Phish

I've been posting samples of particularly funny (read: pathetic) spam or phishing emails (junk mail, or email specifically designed to get your information and/or money). What I've been noticing, however, is that those posts have attracted a lot of search engine traffic. People searching specifically for information that's contained in those emails.

It seems that while these people are well informed enough to be skeptical, they also want these emails to be true.

As I seem to have a never ending load of these emails, and a desire to not see any more people fall for these traps, I'm starting a blog, this blog, where I'll post most if not all of my spam and phishing emails that are not adult in nature. Simple spam ads won't appear here unless they're very funny.

Unless stated otherwise, any mail posted to this blog is junk. Avoid it. Trash it. Report it. Just don't fall for it.